Day 147

Wednesday, October 19, 2005location
Miles: 17537...Stays in Vegas

So we were going to be all cool and not actually tell you anything about Vegas and be all shady about our goings on. But it wasn't that exciting, so we figured you'd be amused by our loser attempts at "doing Vegas."

We started the day at the classy cafeteria buffet at the Imperial. We ate way too much and learned about the many many forms of Keno you can play while sitting on your butt and stuffing your face. Wow.

After work, Keath discovered that they had a Star Wars slot machine and managed to run our "gamblin' money" down to 3 cents. But the machine has many bells and whistles and you can bet on whether Darth or Obi Wan will win the duel. (No - it's not always Darth.) We later learned that the machines right by the front door are not the ones to play. They almost always have the worst payoffs.

We spend most of the day strolling around the strip (at a much more relaxed pace than last night's sprint) and checking out the excessiveness of all the casinos. The Venitian was particularly cool. There's a canal, but you have to pay to ride in the gondola, which was significantly smaller than they made it out to be in their ads. So we didn't. But we did watch as a school teached taught a class of elementary school kids about Italian architecture by bringing them to the casino.

We actually played more than one slot machine in Harrah's and managed to recoup the money lost on Star Wars and walk out $4.60 ahead.

We took the monorail to the Hilton, since it's a loooong walk to the other end of the strip. Thinking we'd be all cool and hop on and off it all day, we bought the daily passes. But we are apparently not that cool. It only really cost a couple of dollars more than one round trip ticket, but we felt kind of silly anyway.

The Hilton has a spaceport themed casino. They have large vaulted ceilings painted to look like steel, big video screens all over the place (apparently, in the future, we will all watch 80's hair band videos), all the science fiction themed slots they could find, a restaraunt called Quark's Bar and Grill, the largest collection of authorized Star Trek memorobelia in the world, and people wandering around in Borg and Klingon costumes. Keath managed to loose another $2. Damn that Men In Black slot.

We headed out to find Circus Circus and spend a little time in the arcade, where none of the machines pretended to have any interest in giving us any of our money back. We stuck around for a couple of the shows. First we saw some trapeze artists, then some great Polish guys painted gold balanced on each other in various ways. Most impressive. They were difficult to photograph, due to the dim lighting, but we tried valiently.

After a brief stroll around the depressing "old Vegas", we headed back to the Hilton for lunch at Quark's Bar and Grill, where we enjoyed a large, fogging green drink called a Borgsphere. Mmm, big fish bowls of alcohol. It (and one of their other signature drinks) is actually served out of a replicator. It looked an awful lot like a strobe light and drips of liquid, but the bartender assured us it was a replicator. It was just broken, so it couldn't make anything but Borgspheres at the moment. After consuming about a gallon of Sprite with alcohol in, we came up with a brilliant plot for the remainder of the afternoon. We would go back down the modern bit of the strip to drink and play slots. (As opposed to our previous plan to "see the sights.")


The highlight of the afternoon was Ceridwen discovering her love of video poker. The interactivity and implied control over the outcome made it decidedly less boring and monotonous than slots. We played for a while at the MGM Grand, where she managed to win back all the money Keath had lost at slots (and then some.) We of course spent at least this much at the bar doing shots to keep the buzz. For some reason, though neither of us have been carded since we were 22 or so, we got carded when we wanted to do slots of Goldschlager in Vegas. Go figure. And the ceiling of the bar was dripping on us. That's not good.

We stopped at the Luxor to ride the infamous "Inclinator." (It's like an elevator, but rides up the side of the pyramid at an . . . incline. Get it?) But the Inclinator has no windows. They have a regular ol' glass elevator, but it only goes up to the fifth floor. What a waste. So, no sights for us. But we took some pictures and played some games and kept a souvenier dollar chip. Oh yeah, and more booze.

We finished the night off at Bally's, somehow managing to eat dinner twice.